Quest for Love

Could there be?

Is it possible to meet someone as devoted, committed, loyal, affectionate, faithful, intimate, passionate, kind, and enduring to love as I am? 

With all my seeking, at the end of every relationship, I did not find myself. 

Instead, I feel even more lost. Still unsure what I’m looking for.

It’s been seven years since I decided to commit to a love that I cannot lose, not even run away from. A love that has me reacting, “How can you find value and choose to love me?” A love that has me looking at my heart’s intentions saying, “I have nothing to offer you but my brokenness.”

Happily ever after…

…as fairy tale paints it, but my reality was far from easy. 

The withdrawal had me feigning, running, and begging the same man to take me back again and again. 

I’m exhausted.

I didn’t know it then, but as my consciousness is awakening, I realized that my emotional childhood trauma and attachment to my father had me reacting to that scene in such a way as well as all my previous relationships before that.

If I could just… 

If I could just find That Which Is Greater than myself… maybe.

TWIG is what I say!

Because we all relate to That Which Is Greater in different ways, but collectively, LOVE is what resonates to the human heart

“Don’t let go yet. If you stay longer, the withdrawal subsides.”

Does it? 

I never saw myself as an addict until I experienced firsthand how difficult it is to let go of what was comfortable, even if it wasn’t what I chose for myself.

But TWIG, clinging to what made sense to me at the time,… faith

a belief that somehow, things will get better for me.

to still believe in LOVE…

most importantly, to believe in My S.E.L.F. 

…This is not the end of my story. 

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